I heard from a Postpartum Progress reader who said that her doctor doesn't want to give her a diagnosis of postpartum depression. The doc said she doesn't like labels and was just going tocall it depression — that it didn't matter what "type" of depression it is, as I recall.
What do you think about that? I can see wherethe docis coming from in that one doesn't want to focus too much on the negative side, but rather on getting back to where you need to be. Mental health, not mental illness. At the same time, as I said to this reader (hi, R!):
"I guess your doc may be right in a way that it probably doesn't matter exactly what the name of the illness is, except that I think women like interacting with other women with the same diagnosis. When you give it a name it makes it less powerful and it alsolet's you find other people who are feeling the same way."
For me, onceI had the exact name of what was happening to me (postpartum OCD), Icould do research, I could talk to other mamas with the same thing andI could explain better what was happening to me to others who didn't understand. I guess in a way I didn't want to be lumped in to thebroader categories of "depression" or "anxiety" because I felt that having this illlness as a new mother had its own set of unique challenges and symptoms.
What do you think? Does it matter to you exactly what your diagnosis is (or was)?
I care. I want to know. Like you said it is very important to me to be able
to connect with other women who suffer from the same. Also, I know depression to some doctors can be just depression but I felt like for me I didn't want to be lumped in a general pool. I am currently seeing a ppd specialist and she believes I have come to the right place. This helps more than you know. My OB didn't much other than write a rx. Glad I found my right diagnosis with the right label. It will help my recovery.
My specific diagnosis absolutely matters.
There is a HUGE difference between PPD with a psychotic event & Postpartum Psychosis. Knowing that distinction & where I fit into it creates a sense of well-being for me.
I care too! Knowing what I have is so important to me in my journey to recovery. I have struggled with this for 4 years and up until 5 months ago I had never even heard of PPOCD. It has been helpful for me to be able to research this specific illness and be able to talk to other women who have recovered from PPOCD.
It 100 PERCENT matters! When I found out (YEARS after actually suffering) that what I had suffered from was Postpartum OCD and NOT psychosis – OMG – the relief I felt! (And I discovered this thanks to you!) I mean, I thought I was insane and going to kill my child. Nothing could have been further from the truth. And yet, shrinks doped me up on so many anti-psychotics that I was a complete and utter zombie for YEARS. When all I probably needed was a good SSRI and some specific therapy. I lost years of my life that I will never, ever get back. My current therapist is also "anti-label" which bothers me. I believe that the more specific a diagnosis you can reach, the more effectively you can treat it – as well as find other women who have suffered from the same.
I see what you are saying, but your comment kind of made me feel like those of us who suffered from PPP are *bad*, *crazy* & *potential murderers*, in short, not good mamas, which we aren't. We just happened to be a little sicker than you & and took a little more to get better.
I know you probably didn't mean for it to come out like that, but that kind of language does hurt, especially those among us going through such a diagnosis right now.
I think an accurate diagnosis for any mental illness– post-partum related or not– is vital. How can we know which direction we need to head in if we don't know where we're coming from???
I was diagnosed with depression 6 years ago. (just reg. depression, PPD came just last year.) I have spent all of that time digging through my past trying to figure out what "caused" it. I did great work in therapy, but there was always a piece missing that I was trying to find.
Within the last 6-7 months (now having been diagnosed with PPD and PPA), my therapist explained (not even sure it was b/c I asked– think it came up in regards to something else) that there are different "types" of depression, or different reasons for depression.
For the first time, I heard that depression can be triggered in various ways. When she mentioned depression as a result of excessive anxiety (over time), something changed in me. At last, SIX YEARS LATER, I knew. I finally knew why. All of the misplaced blame, guilt, etc., was removed (practically instantly) b/c now I understood why I had been depressed. I finally had a clear understanding of how to fight this new variation called PPD because I could see how it linked with my lifetime of anxiety, guilt and perfection seeking which lead to the 1st episode of depression.
SO….for this doctor to refuse to call it PPD… we deserve and NEED to understand the starting points and origins of our illness (as best as we can) in order to know best how to fight it through medication, therapy, life style changes and the like.
Thanks so much for this. The comments are saying all the things that I needed to say, but couldn't put into words in an email at 3am. Hope you don't mind if I give away who you're talking about 😉
As Heidi said: "How can we know which direction we need to head in if we don't know where we're coming from???" Makes sense right? I need labels. Seriously!
Definitely. Having a specific diagnosis gave me a weapon to fight it – with support groups, books, and websites like this.
I'm probably going to offend some people with regular depression here and also show my denial about PPD, but to me – having it labeled "postpartum depression" made me feel like it was more temporary, caused by childbirth, would go away eventually and never return (unless possibly with another child) but even so, I would know when to look for it. A general diagnoses of depression sounded so much more like a lifelong challenge and could rear its head at anytime. So that diagnoses was important to me just for the reason I felt like it was a temporary thing and there was a reason for it. It was something I clung to when fighting through it seemed so hard and scary.
I got the "postpartum" part of my diagnosis about 5 years after I'd had it. I had a hospital stay with it. During those 5 years I felt a shadow following me, waiting to pounce at any time. Once I got the postpartum part of the dx, from a tv show no less!, it was a TREMENDOUS relief. AND I could hit the www and learn more and connect with others experiencing it.
Calling it depression leads some professionals to lumping a mom with PPD into a "group" with other people who are "depressed", even if none of them have children. Uh, major oversight there. I don't think there is a bigger transition in life (other than death itself) than becoming a mother. "Postpartum (or antepartum for that matter)" is key.
Anyone acting as a professional who has any inkling of how an accurate diagnositic name opens doorways, and still insists on calling "PPD" just "depression," is ignorant.
As someone with unipolar depression (but not PPD) who reads this blog, I have to say that sometimes I wish there was more integration between the PPD and general depression communities. While every mental and emotional disorder is unique they face the common challenges of underfuning and stigma, and can benefit from working together.
My first episode of severe melancholic depression began around puberty (not after a pregnancy), with a later psychotic episode in my 20s. Despite not having ever experienced PPD I've found that this blog contains invaluable insights into my own experience–especially the intrusive OCD type thoughts I experienced in my last episode of depression. Katherine's description of her own symtoms really hit home with me even though my intrusive thoughts didn't involve taking care of a child.
I go to a DBSA support group where I've found amazing insights into my own illness by listening to people who have similar but not indentical disorders (in particular people with bipolar disorder, and people with OCD and hoarding issues). I never thought I would be able to learn something from people with a different diagnosis and such different symptoms, but I have learned a lot about the way the mind works, and it's giving me more insight into my own condition.
Sometimes I also feel like there's a certain "exceptionalism" to PPD because it involves motherhood. That's true to some extent–every subtype of depression is unique. But sometimes it seems like PPD is treated as something fundamentally different than depression, rather than as a subtype of depression.
I believe in making diagnoses as specific as possible–it's more informative and can make research more effective. This is VERY important for figuring out which treatments work for which disorders. So, please make the most out of your mental health disorder peer group, but don't forget the absolute necessity of connecting with a wider consumer base in order to effect large scale improvements in mental health services. It may feel safer to stay with other moms, but the mental health consumer comunity needs all the strength and solidarity it can get–at least as far as activism is concerned.
And thank you for sharing your condition on the web, because I'm just one person who has found support and understanding here despite having a different type of depression. Your willingness to talk openly about scary symptoms has been an invaluable source of comfort to me when I face similar issues.
Nina, http://www.reflectionondepression.typepad.com