There is probably no question I am asked more often by moms than, “How long does postpartum depression last?” “How long will I have postpartum anxiety?” Suffering moms are seeking the exact date when the box will be delivered to their door with their old self inside of it.
“Is it 4 months? 12 months? I heard so-and-so got better by 5 months postpartum, and I’m 10 months postpartum and I’m still miserable, so does this mean I’m a lost cause?”
I actually looked this up in my library of PPD books, and searched online, and couldn’t find a single citation of the exact amount of time it takes to recover from postpartum depression and related illnesses. That’s because there isn’t one! There are many different variables affecting how long it takes each person to get better.
1. How long did you suffer from PPD before you reached out for treatment?
Most moms with postpartum depression will fully recover, especially if the illness is diagnosed and treated early. It stands to reason that the longer you wait to get help, the longer it may take for you to get better. Some research has found that the rapid remission of depressive symptoms is the most important predictor for the favorable long-term outcome of a depressive episode. (Scadoczky et al,Journal of Affective Disorders, 2004) In simpler words, the quicker you are treated and the more effective the treatment is, the better result. So, ask yourself, when was it that you finally started on an effective treatment?
2. How severe is your postpartum mental illness?
The more severe your postpartum depression symptoms or postpartum anxiety symptoms, the longer it may take for you to get better. A 2002 study found that more severe depression was associated with a decreased likelihood of early recovery. (Meyers et al,Archives of General Psychiatry, 2002) NOTICE, that doesn’t say decreased likelihood of recovery, just decreased likelihood of early recovery. It makes sense: the worse your symptoms are, the longer it might take to get back to normal. Just know that you WILL get there.
3. How effective is the postpartum depression or postpartum anxiety treatment you have been using?
Some women receive treatment that isn’t particularly effective, so they don’t get better. There are a variety of reasons why this might be the case. There are different kinds of therapies (cognitive behavioral therapy, dialectical behavioral therapy, interpersonal therapy, group therapy, etc.), and different kinds of medications (serotonin reuptake inhibitors, serotonin and norepinephrine reuptake inhibitors, tricyclics, antipsychotics, etc.), different kinds of self-care methods (light therapy, exercise, yoga, supplements, etc.) and even different kinds of support groups (new mom groups, PPD groups that allow moms to bring their babies, PPD groups that don’t allow babies, freewheeling groups and groups with specific agendas at each meeting). It has been proved time and time again that, in the arena of mental health, what works for one person does not always work for another.
In the book “This Isn’t What I Expected”, Karen Kleiman writes, “If you haven’t met your goals or if you are actually getting worse instead of better, it is time to consider a change in treatment or a consultation …” If what you’ve been doing isn’t working, work with your healthcare professional to try something different. Or seek a different professional entirely. We have a list of PPD specialists who have more experience helping moms with PPD. The key is this: Don’t give up. There IS something that will work for you.
By the way, some people actually have treatment-resistant depression.According to the Mayo Clinic, you may have treatment-depression if standard treatments don’t help much or don’t help at all. It can be caused by significant emotional stress, by not taking medications exactly as prescribed, or by other underlying health problems you may have like thyroid disorder, heart problems or substance abuse. Another possibility, if you happen to be on meds, is that your body metabolizes medication more quickly or more slowly than most people. The Mayo Clinic states that you should make sure you’re being treated by a mental health professional (not just your regular doctor), be patient and be willing to try different methods of treatment. This may include different types of therapy, different medications, trying a sleep and exercise program, or newer treatments like vagus nerve stimulation or trans-cranial magnetic stimulation.
4. How effective is the postpartum depression specialist you are working with?
We sometimes make the mistake of assuming the people in the “white coats” know more than we do, so we go along and don’t speak up for ourselves when we know we aren’t getting better despite following the treatment recommendations. It could be that the doctor you’re working with has limited knowledge and experience in the area of perinatal mental health, and has already tried whatever method they know how to use. If you’re in therapy, perhaps the method they are using just doesn’t work for you or the therapist just isn’t a good fit for your personality. If you’re on medication, perhaps they’ve given you too low of a dose, or something that has side effects you can’t stand, or something that flat out doesn’t work. This may be because they aren’t psychiatric specialists, or because they don’t know enough about the medications. Or, perhaps you are in a support group that just doesn’t make you feel comfortable or supported.
You MUST speak up about how you’re feeling and how the treatment plan you are on is, or is not, affecting your symptoms. You must talk about how you feel in the doctor’s or therapist’s office and whether you feel you are being heard and understood. If the healthcare professional you’re working with isn’t willing to try something else or isn’t willing to listen to you, there is another out there who will. Again, Kleiman writes “Treatment failure is not necessarily the fault of the therapist [or doctor]. ‘Good’ therapists often need to change treatment modalities or consider new options when [the treatment] doesn’t have the desired outcome.”
Sometimes, though, you may have just gone to the wrong person for you. That’s okay. You have every right to make a change.
5. What is your current life situation and how may it be affecting your recovery from postpartum depression?
Getting professional help is crucial, but your doctor or therapist can’t come home with you and ensure that your environment is the right one for recovery. If you are in a situation where the people around you are not supportive or you’re not getting any help so that you can have rest and good nutrition, this could slow down your process. If your partner, for instance, doesn’t believe postpartum depression or anxiety or psychosis are real, or isn’t willing to help you get the right amount of sleep or give you help around the house, the resulting stress of that can make it harder for you to get better faster. A study on the role of support from family and friends in recovery from major depression found that emotional support is significantly associated with depression outcome. (Nasser, Acta Scandinavia Psyciatrica, 2004)
As much as you can, reach out to those who are supportive when you need to talk. Ask your most reliable and encouraging family members or friends to pitch in, or maybe reach out to a local moms group or PPD support group for help. If you can’t find local help, you can at least find virtual emotional support from people who know what you’re going through here at Postpartum Progress. We have a private forum for moms who don’t have access to in-person support groups. It’s free to join and totally private.
6. What have you been doing to follow your postpartum depression treatment plan and take care of yourself?
In the end, no doctor can make you show up for appointments. Therapy will fail if you don’t open up to your therapist and aren’t willing to try some of the coping techniques your counselor suggests you try. No medication will work if you don’t take it, or you only take it some days. No support group will help if you don’t attend. Poor sleep and lack of nutrition can prevent anybody from being healthy. Remember that you need to take a key role in your recovery process. I know it’s hard. I know you feel like crap. I also know that you can dig deep down and do this. Taking care of yourself and making your health a priority is the best gift you can give to both you and your baby.
One final note: Once you start to feel better, and you will, the Mayo Clinic suggests that, “It’s important to continue treatment after you begin to feel better … Stopping treatment too early may only lead to a relapse.” Don’t quit the minute you feel like things are turning the corner. Work with your healthcare professional to decide when it’s the right time to slowly wean off your treatment plan.
Um, yeah, this is SO freaking true. I'm more than a year postpartum, but still suffering from time to time. BUT, I've been through 2 moves, 1 to a new city, 1 job change (about to be 2), crazy travel situations badly timed during moves, a hellish commute, a major illness, sick baby x4 or 5, 7 therapist and 6 psychiatrist changes, and more. If I didn't have PPD before, I'd probably have it from my life circumstances anyway. But, I've learned to be gentle with myself and do what I need to do to feel better, whether that's relying on someone else to help me or taking medication. I no longer feel bad about it and know that I'm going to help myself cope/improve as a result. Eventually my life chaos will calm and so will I. 🙂
You certainly have a positive attitude. . .keep it up and rest when ever you can. Miracles don’t happen overnight (sometimes) but every day you wake up and smile you are making a big decision to keep going and you show how strong you are. Your words will help others to ‘keep on…keeping on’. God bless.
It is SO fantastic that you not only recognize that these were majorly stressful things but also that you need to be kind to yourself and realize this is a process and it takes time! Wonderful!
I was diagnosed early (6 weeks PP) and it was truly a blessing. I was able to start treatment immedietly. I was on Zoloft for almost 8 months before weaning off recently. I'm not sure when (or if) I will be ready to stop counseling, but I know the place I am now is so much better than it was last September. I'm not healed, but I'm getting better.
I am taking Zoloft now and it is helping with the underlying generalized anxiety but I am still having the attacks. THere is more time between them, but when I do have them they generally take my entire day. I’m 9 months postpartum and waiting for this to be over…..
Big hugs Liz. Glad you are getting the help you need and fingers crossed that the panic attacks go away ASAP!
I am goin through this postnatal depression n recently started working.i was getting back n had developed confidence in myself but to my bad luck my boss n fellow mates started picking up on me n I felt lost again.i resigned after a month and feeling so low again.just saw da posts on this site and felt relieved dat its normal to have those thoughts of failure and dat it’s my condition not me whose thinking like this.its been 7months on medication but I am not having counselling. I hope I’ll get better soon and will be able to enjoy.just wanted to mention dat I feel more of da negative symptoms few days before n during my periods. Don’t know if anyone else has noticed this. I am glad that my family n husband is supportive about this and I wish all u moms a speedy recovery and I know for sure we will all be fine one day n will be happy in our lives again. This six stages thing really gave me hope that I am on track for recovery.god bless
I need help! I don’t know how to help myself.
Postpartum depression and anxiety are real illnesses, so even though we think we should be able to help ourselves out of them, we really need the help of health professionals. Have you reached out to your doctor to talk about what you are going through? If you don’t have a physician you are comfortable with, try checking out our list: http://postpartumprogress.com/womens-mental-health-treatment-programs-specialists-us-canada-australia. You can also check out the list at postpartum.net.
Zoloft made me worse
That can happen for some moms, especially because with most meds there is an increase in symptoms at the start, and that passes and then the meds often help, at their therapeutic level. I’m on zoloft and it works great for me. Everyone is different, so keep that in mind when you try things, because you will have your own unique experience.
Hi Heather, I’m writing a screenplay about a character with PPD issues and would like your opinion on an issue. Your input would be greatly appreciated. My character had PPD for years and years later, when her now adult daughter considers having a child, she fears having a similar condition. After all, her mother’s PPD was a defining element in her own childhood. Is that realistic? Can you suggest information on long-term PPD? Thank you so much for your help.
Thank you for posting this. I am 31 weeks tomorrow, and I want to be as informed as possible on the topic. I struggle with anxiety so I know I may be at risk. I look forward to following this blog whether or not I suffer because I can't think of a more worthy way to support women.
Wonderful article and thread!! I also suffer from anxiety and I am bipolar. I am 26 weeks pregnant and I fear that I will have some sort of PPD/PPOCD. I have been reading up on sites like this one, and it does make me feel better. I feel better educated about this illness, and I’ll make sure I’m prepared for it with my OB GYN and psychiatrist. Also, I’m going to set up therapy sessions. Thanks a zillion and keep pressing on. God bless! Xoxo.
Way to go Tracy! Good for you for educating yourself. Maybe you won’t get PPD, but if you do you’ll know there is help and how to get it. So important!
Is long-term PPD a viable condition to give a character in a story? Can you suggest information on PPD that lasts for several years? I’d really appreciate your input.
Hear Hear! I'm a PPD survivor who also has a lot of dealings with PPD moms (some diagnosed, some not).
I've had so many experiences with people who are rushing to end treatment the first time they have a good day. I don't quite understand the instinct, "Hey this is working so I should STOP DOING IT." Really? But it happens so often. And it's such a shame.
And I also second the point about taking time to care for yourself. It's so hard to carve out "me" time when you have a baby but even a few hours a week make such a difference! I used to go to Starbucks by myself and read the paper. $5 plus 2 hours of alone time = priceless.
Really good information!
Hi – I went through post-partum psychosis before there was a name for it. 1981- could not think a whole thought after my second baby was born (13 mos.after baby 1.) I got help and have 3 great adult kids! Advice- -get psychatriic Help!Saved me.. saved baby 2 and made possible baby #3 (who will be a Dr. soon!)Hope and help throug God…
My youngest daughter has always been the center of attention in every situation. She always said she didn’t really want kids because they require too much work and attention. Her husband wanted them so she agreed to have them. She had a little bit of the baby blues with her first son and her husband became the primary care giver to the child. When she had her second she had severe PPD. It got so bad that her therapist said she should not be alone with the children. She slept all day and was up all night. She cried for no reason at all and would take off on long walks without telling anyone. We worried so much for her. We footed the therapist bill, her diapers and formula for a year, and countless hours of babysitting and overnight stays. She shut us out. The only texts or calls we would get would be from them would say they needed more diaers or formula or money. Our funds are drained. I am drained. It has been well over a year and a half and she still will not take care of her own children. If her husband has to work or they want a date night they ask me or his parents to take care for the children. Her facebook page shows no pictures of her children nor does she ever mention them in her posts. It is as though it is still just her and her husband. Pictures of them kissing, on date nights and vacations….but no children. It hurts me to no end to think my child does not care for her children. Her husband just texted me and asked if I could babysit this weekend. I am in such a bind. It is extremely inconvienent for me this weekend yet I don’t feel I can say no. When does this end? There are times I wonder if she is just taking advantage of the PPD and using it so she does not have to have the responsibility of her children. I feel awful just saying that but it is affecting me in more ways than I can say. She still stays up late at night and sleeps during the day. She never has her children alone, she says she can’t. She will not even pick them up from daycare because she’ll have to be alone with them. She says she’ll like her kids when they are old enough to care for themselves. I do not know how long that will take. I feel so broken. Has anyone had a similar experience? Can anyone offer the light at the end of this tunnel?
You need to care for yourself to help your family. You matter too.
I am in this situation now. It has been nearly two years since you posted this Trisha. What happened? How did you move forward?
I just read Trisha’s comment and I’m so curious to know–did it end up getting better?? I have a GF now that is like this, and personally I feel she is taking complete advantage of her parents. Her kids are now 7 and almost 2, and still refuses to care for them on her own.
she probably is still sick. my daughter is six kids and still suffering. so so sad
Great article! I’m dealing with PPOCD for the second time. I dealt with intrusive thoughts in 2005 when my first baby was 6 months old. My third baby was born in December and I worried about dealing with it the entire time I was pregnant. I didn’t leave the hospital without a Zoloft prescription but apparently not enough. After 6 weeks of keeping my intrusive thought to myself I decided to let my husband and the psychologist that I saw 9 years ago know that I was freaking out. At one point I was asking my husband to take me to the hospital. The psychologist did increase my Zoloft prescription. From my prior experience, I know I will heal eventually but right now my heart hurts and I can’t wait for this to go away. I feel like I’m robbing myself of these first few amazing months with my sweet baby. I just want to be able to be in the house with her without counting down the number of hours until my older children or my husband get home.
I know it’s awful Mary Catherine, and I’m so sorry you have to deal with this. You’re doing all the right things, though, by asking for and accepting help. Keep in contact with your doctor so that he or she knows how you are doing and if you treatment plan is working. You will get better.
Great article. I am a first time mom almost 11 months postpartum and was in denial about my PPD because I wanted to breastfeed And was told I would have to stop if I took an antidepressant. I breastfed/pumped my daughter for 7 months. At month 8 the suicidal thoughts and crying spells didn’t go away so I saw a therapist and started celexa. When I had my daughter last July I went through several major transitions in life. I quit my stressful job at 4 months pregnant, built a house, my mother was hospitalized and couldn’t travel so only my husband was at the hospital during the birth. My water broke 2 days after moving into our new home and I had to have a c section. One week after the delivery my dad had bypass surgery. And i found out i have scoliosis, osteoarthiritis, and a bulging disc in my back.I went back to work fulltime after only 8 weeks and was blamed for my work not being done while I was out on maternity leave so I was given a strict deadline to catch up. Now my aunt just passed away from cancer, my uncle her husband was also diagnosed with an agressive cancer, my mom is 51 on oxygen so she still cant travel, my dad was just hospitalized with a blood infection and my baby is sick with a cold. I have a few health issues myself and I haven’t honored myself enough to take care of me. Oh and my marriage is not doing well so there is no intimacy. I think the only reason I am surviving is due to my type A get it done personality and the counselor I have had for several years. I am not healed but I’ve come a long way.
My son is now two I got diagnoized with postnatal depression wen my son was 8 weeks old he’s now 3 months off being two I have moved house and had to move doctors and they stopped my medication for postnatal and said I have a thirod problem I keep going back and saying I still feel the same as I did when I had my son I have to live everyday as it comes as I cnt remember what I did yesterday who I spoke to or seen it’s so scared and lonely I don’t hear voices I just feel high or low drift of in to day dreams tierd constantly an my main worry is am I ever going to come out off this I missed the loud bubbly outgoing now I’m none of this when I’m round people I carnt keep up with convos as I just keep drifting off in to my own little bubble if you like if anyone has experienced this please get in touch I’m 27 with 4 children an never gone tho this with my 3 girls was just my boy
I don’t think it ever goes completely away. My son is 5.5 and my daughter is almost 3 and I am sitting here crying my eyes out because I can’t face going out with friends and leaving them. I just want to hide. I love them and would never ever hurt them.
Have you received any treatment? I’m sorry you are still struggling and I hope you have support through family and friends and a doctor or therapist. You can get better and I’m sorry you’ve been struggling so long.
I agree with Heather King, that is really long. What was your treatment plan from the beginning? Meds, therapy …
My name is Jessica and I’d like to tell you a little about the last seven years of my life.
During my pregnancy with my first son I had prenatal depression that led to pnd when my son was born. Counselling and medication was unable to cure me. I had the usual pnd symptoms and felt suicidal. I loved my son but didn’t want him.
On my son’s first day of school (age 4) I was in a state and took myself to the doctor for help. He told me I didn’t have pnd and I was left feeling confused because I felt the same as I did from day one with my son. I began to believe I was in this situation forever more.
Through determination and alot of effort I managed to figure out what was wrong with me. My depression (from the pnd) had lifted as I had felt fine within myself however, I was left with bonding problems due to the illness disrupting the early years that were for bonding. My son felt alien to me. I found it difficult to hug him, kiss him, cut his nails, bath him,hold his hand and even touch his clothes. I found interacting with him difficult and felt no joy from being his mother.
Speaking to health professionals and support organisations I was told they had never experienced this before and therefore had no advice or form of treatment. An internet search shows only ways to bond with a baby and an adopted child but not an older child.
I hope you feel some comfort and relation to my story. If you feel you need to talk then please send me an email at firstname.lastname@example.org.
My story is being published in Feb 2017 and I am campaning for this condition to be researched in order to reach a diagnosis and form of treatment for women.
I’m 6 months pp I have been on 200mg of zoloft for 8 years I stopped taking them at the end of my pregnancy because I thought I didn’t need them anymore and then boom as soon as I was in labor my anxiety came back so I started taking them again well about 3 months later I stopped taking them again well on and off and soon I stopped taking them all together all of a sudden 3 days ago I was watching TV with my uncle where this women killed her kids and I started thinking I was gunna go crazy like that I couldn’t get a out of my head I have horrible thoughts they range from maybe my daughter would be better with out me or I am a horrible mom I feel like my mind can not calm down or stop think and the thoughts I think I’m so ashamed of them because there horrible and I love my daughter so much she is my world I don’t know why all of a sudden this started I know it’s probably from just stopping my medication but is it also post pardom depression? ??? I need help and I hope you ladies understand what I’m going through. I’m scared to go to a psychiatrist because I don’t want them to take my baby away I don’t know what I would do with out her.
Hi Shannon, I’m sorry you are feeling like this. It would be best to talk to a doctor. You can say you are struggling with severe anxiety and depression and they will help you. If you’ve been on Zoloft in the past and done well, sometimes that’s all they need to hear–that you know yourself and that you are struggling again and need to be back on your meds. You can get better, but you need help, mama. I’m sending you peace.
One thing I hear is “if you just be positive….”. What most people neglect to understand is that so done who NEEDS medication for any kind of depression or a city disorder CANNOT JUST do xyz and all better. ESP if they are surrounded by unsupportive people or alone with their children 5 days a week or more.
Hi everyone. I am abt a yr in with ppd. I am on anti depressants and counseling.. but i still feel anxiousness and i feel like crying n end up crying most days. I also have not much to talk to my counsellor abt anymore. When will i get out of this
Hello Mary. Thank you for reaching out. We cannot tell you how long, because it’s different for every person. I would imagine that with counseling and medication you should be on the right track, but if you feel that you are not, it’s time to talk with your providers about whether or not you and they think this is the best treatment plan for you. Sometimes Cognitive Behavioral Therapy is helpful, or a medication change. I hope you find the right path for you very soon, mama. I’m sending you peace…
I need advice.
I need advice. We had our third child 8 months ago. I will start off saying I use to be the most laid back and patient person. Always have LOVED kids and wanted a BIG family. Since we had our third child I feel though as if I stay tired all the time. No energy but can’t sleep at night.I get aggravated and frustrated for no reason or over the smallest things. I cry alot. I feel sad all the time or though as if no one cares about me or just bad thoughts in general. I been reading about PPD and all the symptoms are there. It has gotten worse over the last few months. I’m just tired of feeling this way I want to be myself again. What is the best way to go? Who should I call doctor or therapist or both?
I’m so glad you have discovered what is wrong, so now you can get better. I’m sorry you’ve been hurting though. You can call your doctor or a therapist, either is fine. Most mamas respond best to a combination of talk therapy and medication. Not everyone needs/wants meds, but that’s up to you and your doctor. I’m sending you peace, and if you need any help looking for help near you, please let me know and I will help look for a specialist.
I know this is an old post, but I’m currently 6 weeks postpartum with #2 and I’m struggling with bad ppd. We knew it was probable since I had it with my first but this time feels worse. I’m on 200 Zoloft and a low dose of lorazepam at night but I feel like I’m Worse now. Not sure what meds I need but I need to feel
Better. I’m barely sleeping ( even less than just when the baby’s up). I’m overwhelmed and I have thoughts I don’t want to have ( though I do t think I’d act on them). I know it’ll Be ok eventually like with my first but I can’t see myway there yet.
It’s so hard to believe it will be okay again, but it WILL. Keep reaching out to your doctor if the meds are not helping. And join us in our private forum to talk more about this, and to be reminded that you are SO not alone in this. The link is http://smartpatients.com/postpartumprogress
It is free and private.
Peace to you, mama.
Hi, my wife is 18 months postpartum. She feels like she isn’t pretty anymore and doesn’t believe me when I tell her she is. She easily flies off the handle with me over things that seem to me as no big deal. She is so sad and crying all the time. The list goes on, a lot of the same things the other women have posted. I want to help her but not sure how. Can you give me some help tips?
steve, I’m sorry you are both going through this. It’s terribly hard, and it’s so good of you to come here and reach out for help. I don’t know if your wife has gotten any help for PPD, but that’s a place to start. Seeing a doctor or therapist would be very helpful, if that’s possible for you with insurance, location, etc. She can get better with help–this isn’t her fault, or your fault, it is an illness. I hope you are able to hang in there while she heals and gets healthy. That usually happens with therapy and treatment of some kind. Many mamas do best on medications (at least for a time) and talk therapy.
i really feel for all of the women that have suffered from this kind of depression. I suffer from depression, and have throughout my life, but never postpartum.my friends wife was diagnosed with postpartum depression but dont know any of the details on if she recieved help or if she did if she carried through with it, but here it is, almost 21 years since the birth of her last baby and she is a mess. my friend, her husband seems to think that she is still suffering from postpartum depression. is that possible? she has sent him to jail claiming abuse by him when it was a total fabricated lie. she has now caused them to be homeless and i am afraid that this is gonna put him in a early grave. through it all, he still stands by her and i dont know just how much more he can take. i feel so terrible but i had to just throw them out of my house cause she stole something outta my house after i opened my home to them, against my families advice not too. she needs help, he needs help, and now i need help!!! does anyone have a suggestion(s)? i could sure use one!!!
shelly, if PPD is not treated, it can continue (and sometimes change or get worse). It does not for everyone, but yes it does for some people. If she has never received help, she may have always continued to struggle. The people in her life can only gently encourage her to get help. If she refuses, there is unfortunately not much you can do unless she is a danger to herself or others in an immediately threatening way.
I’m sorry you’ve all gone through this. Counseling for everyone close to the situation would be a really good step for each of you.
I am 8 months with PPD/PPA and PTSD. I was medically mismanaged and had to go through several doctors before finding the perfect team. My first doc didn’t take me seriously and made everything worse. I also suffered from insomnia that consisted of energy jolts over and over in the middle of the night. I had the thoughts that I’d be better off dead, total dispair. I had an ER trip bc I thought I was losing my mind and after I was sent home I started to look at hospitals that I could be committed to. My husband had to quit his job to be a caretaker to me and our baby. Finally, about 40 days ago, my psychiatrist found the perfect mix of meds to get my sleep back (Belsomra and Trazadone) and got me on the right anti-depressant (Celexa). I was on Zoloft but I had the most terrifying experiences on that. I also have Xanax for anxiety. The right med combo and weekly therapy (sooooooo helpful) have finally gotten me on the proper healing track but I can tell I have a long path in front of me.
I have 3 kids and every single time I go through this. I feel like it has never gone away. I had my oldest son when I was 19. I took Zoloft that didn’t help I cant remember what happened after that because that was so long ago but I took trazadone along with other medications after my daughter was born (but it was very scary waking up with her at night taking trazadone I was very out of it so I wouldnt recommend personally taking that while caring for a baby at night) and was frequently going to Easter Seals and going through different medications every month to try to figure out what would help. I had an amazing case manager but a really crappy therapist that couldn’t relate to me and just had her face in her paper and couldn’t feel what I was going through and or care or understand. I gave up and wrongly stopped taking the medications. I felt like none of them actually helped me so now I just had my son that is 6 months and I am a total wreck. I feel like I am a totally different person, and in a worse situation then I began with and I just freak out on everyone and anyone. Cry all day everyday, I am mean to my husband and kids. I feel like everyone is out to get me. Had a few bad legal situations with my husband that I feel my depression or ppd drove me to act the way I did. Lack of appetite, sleep, happiness, sex drive and everything. I feel like I am loosing it. I just went to see a doctor in internal medicine crying he turned me away and was very rude to me and said go see a psychiatrist. I just kept all this inside and went to see my doctor for my results of my pft breathing test and he asked if I had anything else to bring up and I told him about my ppd and he prescribed me wellubutrin for the ppd and smoking cessation, ibuprofen, and two inhalers. Reading up on these articles helps a lot and having a loving supportive husband also helps; however its hard for him to truly understand what us women go through. Thanks for posting everyone. I wish everyone the best luck and pray for relief for all of you.
Hello there, I’m so sorry you’ve been going through all of this for so long. There are specialists that can give you some real help.
Here is a list divided by state and city. I hope there is someone near you – http://postpartumprogress.com/womens-mental-health-treatment-programs-specialists-us-canada-australia
My daughter is 18 months is it possible to still have post partum depression? I feel like it’s gotten worse
Yes, it’s possible. You were most likely struggling all along and this illness will get worse if left untreated. I hope you have a doctor you can trust to talk with to start the recovery process. This is treatable and with time and help, you WILL get better. Peace to you…
That’s how old my daughter is, I guessed I had PPD earlier but figured (or wanted to think) that it would get better as she got older but that wasn’t the case.
Hi, I had my son when I was 17 (he’s now 13) and I didn’t know about postpartum depression until recently within the past few years. I was never diagnosed but I may have experienced a few symptoms. Would it be possible to still have it? I have always had thoughts and feelings of not being a good enough mother or that I didn’t bond with him as a baby the way I should have.
Annette, untreated PPD can become chronic depression if left untreated. Both conditions can be treated and recovery is possible. It would be good to talk with your doctor, if that’s possible for you. Or make an appointment with a therapist if you don’t have one. I’m sending you peace.
I’ve struggled with depression for a long time and in pregnancy had a pychotic episode and was diagnosed with postpartum pychosis. I had a c-section and gave birth 2weeks early. I was in a mother and baby ward for 3 weeks, then on medication for 6 months for pychosis and still on antidepressants now. I was discharged from the psychiatric follow up may this year no more sessions with them. My son has just turned two and I’m constantly anxious, having negative thoughts about myself as a mother, I used to be so scared of something bad happening to him, and I love him so incredibly much he changed my life but i feel disconnected more than not. i have a lot of help from family which also makes me feel guilty because I think everyone is having digs at me constantly and I don’t know what to think anymore. I feel I’m at the end of my tether, some days I feel so lost and don’t know where to turn. In need of some advice, all I want is to be the best I can be for my son.
I hope you have continued with professional help. It sounds like therapy would be really good, if you are not doing that. Frequent therapy that focuses on patterns of thinking, something like CBT. It’s also okay if you still need medication ongoing. Many mamas do, and that’s okay. Things certainly change after going through pregnancy and birth. You are going to be okay, and hanging in there simply means to keep going, even when you feel awful. There is another side to this, there is a way through. It takes a lot of help and we ALL need help sometimes. Peace to you….
Is it normal to feel these symptoms over the course of years? My daughter will be three this month and I’m losing my mind. At times I have no patience whatsoever I find my self crying a lot and for reasons I can’t even explain. I can’t sleep. I’m over emotional. My anger sky rockets. Idk how to control these feelings. I lost my relationship with my daughters father. He said I’m going “crazy” and losing my mind.
Regina, it’s possible for the postpartum symptoms to last for years if left untreated, or not treated in the way that helps you individually. It takes time and the right help for you, and I hope that’s possible in your situation. If you have the option, please reach out to a professional and get started on the road to recovery. You are not alone, this is common and does last for many mamas who simply don’t get the help they need.
Peace to you…
*Sorry in advance for this long post, but I’m looking for answers and want to give you everything you need and if any spouses are going through what I am, would love to here from you.
Hi everyone, need some help here. Just a little background… before the baby we had an awesome life, we laughed, had fun, played the same sports together, we were a perfect match in bedroom, life couldn’t be any better. My wife and I have a son just over 2 years old. I noticed a change in her about 8 months in, but when I think back I probably saw it at about 3 months. I told her that she should go talk to someone, she said she was fine and at this point I blame myself not trying harder to get her to go talk to someone now. Just to point out also, a little background on me, I took care of our son, got up in the middle of the night, so she could sleep did the housework, laundry paid all the bills, so she would have any of this stress and still do so to this day. So the first time she left me was when our son was 14 months, she left for about 3 weeks or so, she said she didn’t know if she loved me like that anymore, this was very hard thing to hear, believe me. She went to talk to a therapist, then she came back. She said the house stressed her so I took out the things that stressed her (my things) and cleaned out the clutter, finished little projects ect… Things were better, but still not at all the same, but I knew this would take time. I notice her changing again around the holidays and in January had a little relapse again, she told me about the therapist she went to see and said that she hadn’t worked for her at all. When she explained to me her methods I told my wife that I wish she had told me this earlier because I would have told her to go see some else, in the end she stayed. The second time she left was in April of this year, our son was 21 months. Things once again weren’t good for a little while, at this point I was tired myself because I was doing everything and she didn’t appreciate anything and treated me like crap ( I know this is because of the depression). She asked me to leave for one week, so she could think a little, I told her it would be ok as long as she went to talk to someone else, she agreed and she did it. Her first session was about 2 weeks from time she left and she had a weekly visit with the counselor. On her second week, I asked her, how did it go, did he say that I’m the cause of this, that maybe you don’t love me, she answered “Actually, no he said I had nothing to do with you, I was baby stress (PPD) and all the other stresses in my life.” so she kept seeing him, for about 6 sessions. We decided to take a small trip for a weekend, just the two of us, this was at her 4 session in. She told the counselor this and he was happy as this would be a good thing. At this session he also told her that she had lost HER SELF. She love going to the gym at was a big part of her life and did Olympic style lifting. He wanted her to go back to the gym and didn’t want to see her for two weeks to give her time to register and get back into it. Our trip was good, but she didn’t get back to the gym before her appointment, we went rollerblading a few days before her next appointment and she said, this would do for now as it is some sort of exercise. She had a few more sessions then he told her that things were better and that if she needed more help to book an appointment. E few weeks after her last session, she came back home. week one was fantastic, week two, she tells me it’s not going to work. I told her to give it a chance, go to the gym like the counselor said, give it a go. (side note, doing activity is so important as it’s gets the happy going on in your body with a proper diet) A few weeks after this, she’s at staff party, that night, when I though she was there having fun, she tells me she was in her car crying, she googling things. In her text to me I get “This is me (with a link to a depression web site) and I think I need meds. I was so happy to hear her finally just admitting she had PPD/ now a depression, I started to cry. I went to the web site, I think it had 5 major headings with about 5 or so things in each. It’s said if you have a few things in each or even a few of the heading, you are suffering from depression, she had all of them but 2. So this July she started taking meds, her doctor also ask if she had any hobbies or things she likes to do. She answered,” well the gym.” Her doctor told her he wanted her to do 45 minutes of any type of exercise every day, he asked her, “do you know why I’m telling you this”, she answered back “because it’s good for me”, he told her, “well exercise does the same as a pill will do, but naturally so it’s important to do it and I would like you to go talk to someone again (her counselor)”. Well she took the meds, then got her out to the gym. She said it felt so good to go, she was happy, she only went 2 times. In august a customer of mine (female) came in and said “you don’t look so good” I responded ” ya, life” she said ” I know what you mean, my grandmother, who is like a mother to me, is on her last days” and for some reason, I just decided to tell her my story, she stopped me and said, She had the same thing and knew exactly what my wife was going through and told me not to give up on her as if she did things, that it will get better. She told me she hated her husband and that if at this time, he hadn’t been away 6 days a week because of his work, she would have left him. One day she was reading something and that’s what made her realize to get help, she did and is fine today. well told my wife her story and said that she offered to talk to her in a few weeks when things settled in her life with the passing of her grandmother. My wife then took up refinishing furniture as a way of relaxing, she purchased lots of old things, I totally supported this, she did a few pieces and she is fantastic at it, I tell her she is awesome and not just to encourage her, she IS really great at it. But, I have a warehouse full of furniture that she isn’t taking time to do, just like going to the gym. I’ve now been walking on eggshells for the past 7 months or so, so don’t want to do anything to spark her wanting to leave, so I shut my month and say nothing. At this point people are saying why do you even put up with it, I tell them, because I love her and our little family and I know that she does love me, that it’s because of the depression that this is happening. I totally understand that it is not her fault, it’s the imbalance in her body that is doing this to her. in October she told me she stopped taking meds as the needed to get a refill and was to lazy to go get it. So I didn’t say anything and now this past Saturday she left me again and 10 minutes after she left, she sent me a text saying that she was second guessing her decision again. I just don’t know what to do anymore, this is so hard on me, lucky I have my son to keep me positive, but this is just draining me out. I know if she would to go talk to a counselor again, do her gym, eat better and do her hobby, I know things would, with time, get back to normal. The most important thing in my life a my family and keeping it together, I believe that when something is broken, you don’t throw it out, you fix, but I just don’t know what to do, I know what needs to be done (counseling, guy, eating better and hobbies), but don’t know how to get her to do it without making things worse. Thanks for being an ear to my story, just had to put it out there, hope she can find her way so that we can be a happy family again, please pray for her. Thank you