Another in our open letter series to doctors. This OB told our letter writer that her postpartum depression symptoms were just part of being a new mom.
I received a call two weeks postpartum from the lactation consultant within my OB practice. I immediately broke down on the phone and told her I was not doing well. She dismissed it as “baby blues” and said, “It’s hormones and it will get better.”
At my 6-week postpartum checkup, I was worse. I complained of severe fatigue yet difficulty sleeping and excessive worrying about the baby. My obstetrician’s response? “That’s part of being a new mom.”
Things continued to get still worse for me. My severe fatigue continued, as well as poor sleep which eventually led to feelings of severe anxiety even though there was nothing to be anxious about. I started losing weight, and at about seven months postpartum I was down to 105 pounds. My resting heart rate was 97 beats per minute. Someone suggested an EEG. I completed that and it showed normal heart rhythms but an unusually high heart rate. I went back to my OB and told him about all my persisting symptoms. He then gave me a choice: to go to a sleep clinic for a sleep study or make a referral to cardiology. I chose cardiology.
My appointment with cardiology led to an echocardiogram. This then led to a trans-esophogeal echocardiogram because they suspected a possible hole in my heart. They had to put me under for this. My heart was perfectly fine. I received a clean bill of health but unfortunately felt no better.
By this point I began to understand how some people commit suicide. I couldn’t imagine going through the rest of my life feeling this way. With this thought, I gave in and felt my last resort was to reach out on my own to have my mental health assessed.
Thankfully I followed my instinct. I couldn’t shake the feeling that this was all somehow connected to pregnancy and having a baby since I never had any of these issues prior to having my daughter. I was fortunate enough to find a nurse practitioner at another OB clinic in my town that specialized in women’s mental health. I made an appointment.
By this time, my daughter’s first birthday was just a month away. I had been suffering for months and months. I met with the nurse practitioner and within two visits she diagnosed me with postpartum depression and started me on medication paired with counseling. She warned me that I had gone so long being sick that it was going to take longer for my brain to rehabilitate and heal. After two months on medication and therapy I started to feel like myself again and I eventually got my life back. That nurse practitioner saved my life.
My daughter will be three years old in four months, and I’m ten weeks away from my due date with our second daughter. I have been off my meds the entire pregnancy and feeling great. I have since changed OBs to the same clinic where my nurse practitioner works. They have been wonderful and have addressed mood and proactive treatment with an antidepressant as soon as I deliver.
Thank you for sharing your story; it sounds similar to mine. What medications were you given to help you? How were you able to get your sleep back? I haven't found the right med for me so I am still struggling with this.
Sorry it's taken me so long to reply. My nurse practitioner started me on Lexapro and it was the right med for me. treats anxiety and depression. 20mg was too much and at first 10 was too little, 15 was just right for me and soon I was able to drop down to 10. Once I got feeling better, the sleep just came.
These stories make me angry beyond words. Disgracefully uneducated doctors hurting new mothers with their shameful ignorance! This mother suffered for a year because of a doctors mistake! And there are thousands if not millions of stories just like this. Unacceptable. Thank you Katherine Stone for all the hard work you do! I hope you make a link at the top just for this series because I think it is so important. It's the reason you do what you do. Now I'm off to go ask my husband if we can empty our bank account to donate to postpartum progress. 😉
That's interesting you talked about your HR. In my situation, it was the other way around!! I began having chest pains and panic symptoms and in the ER, doctors told me my HR was 50 and they asked if I was athletic. I was a runner,but I hadn't run for 2 years! I was so traumatized by the HR thing–I thought I was going to die, and would keep checking my pulse. However, over time, my psychiatrist told me that the hormones made my HR lower. And I'm really healthy. It's just a matter of re-training my brain because I am still in the post-traumatic stage of recovery!!
My midwife was so wretched, I never went back for my 6 week check up. I struggled with PPD for almost a year before I became non functional and had to get help.
I'm so sorry that you had to struggle so long, but I'm glad you were finally able to.
~ K
Words elude me.
You suffered for that long. Hon, I am so sorry.
I remember having a check up a week after my son was born. She did the assessment and said that I had the blues. I swore to her that it wasn't. That I wasn't right. And she fluffed it off.
So I believed it was the blues. When I brought my son to my family doctor, I had asked how long does the blues last and she laughed at me. She said "Do you have family support?" and I said yes…she said "Do you cry all day" and I said no because my main symptom was extreme anger and anxiety…then she laughed and said "You're just tired. You don't have anything"…yea.
I had my first PPD 27 years ago. Couldn't eat or sleep and I was hyperventilating. Called the OB who told me that he could prescribe Valium, but since I was breastfeeding….it would be my choice to take it! Thankfully I WAS breastfeeding–because I called my pediatrician. He kept close tabs on me until he finally sent me to a psychiatrist. With my third child (and new husband), my OB told me that I "wouldn't have time for a postpartum depression" (supposedly to allay my fears of another occurence). I thought things had changed!
After my third child (and 3rd bout)….I used an experimental protocol involving progesterone, which worked like a charm. But the psychiatrist told me and my husband that sleep is KEY! She helped us come up with a schedule where I got 6 hours of sleep a night (thank goodness for my wonderful husband!). This helped just as much probably.
Good luck to all who are suffering. It DOES get better. You just have to persist until you find the right help.
Oh I love that one. You won't have time for postpartum depression! As if the busier we are, we're protected from getting it. UGH!