I'm quite sure I came by my posptartum OCD honestly. I'm one anxious creature by nature. I am not the kind of person who goes sky diving, if you know what I mean. I always lock my car twice.

On top of that, from day one (as is apparent since I suffered a postpartum anxiety disorder) I have felt that I wouldn't be a good-enough mother. I wouldn't do it right. They wouldn't love me. I'd screw it up somehow.I'm convinvedwe'll be sitting on a therapist's couch about a decade-and-a-half from now and I'll be apologizing profusely for everything from what I fixed for breakfast to how I should have made them make their own breakfast so they'd have been more self-sufficient.

This neurosiscontinues toaffectme. It has now even extended itself to pets.

We got akitten right before Christmas. He's about 4 months old. I was determined from the moment we got him to be super-loving and let him know I'm his mom and give him lots of pets and adoration, all to win his love and eternal loyaltyI suppose … as if he'll be able to pay for my nursing home when I'm80 or something …

So the other night at bedtime I pulled him up on the bed, hoping he'd curl up next to me and sleep like he's done thus far. Instead, he pulls away from me like this is his one and only chance to escape Alcatraz and jumps off the bed, skittering out of the room.

How do I react? I think to myself, and I'm not kidding about this, well that's it. He's over it. I can't even parent a cat. He would rather go sleep somewhere else than next to me. Now I'm going to spend the next 12-15 years or whatever taking care of a cat that doesn't like me. Way to go, Katherine.

Not five minutes later, said cat jumps up onto the bed, snuggles right up close, starts purring, and goes to sleep. For the rest of the night he slept on various parts of my face.

Apparently all he needed to do was to go the bathroom.

I've REALLY got to lighten up.