So a while back I heard from Julie Rosenberg, a writer for ParentDish who was doing a story on PPD. Honestly it's hard to remember when it was, and I'm not trying to be a butthead when I say that, it's just that I already have no memorywhatsoever.
Recently she emailed again asking me for a pic for the story and I said sure no problem and sent one of me with my gorgeous boy. Yes, that boy.
Then I saw the story came out today and it was ALL about using antidepressants during pregnancy. I didn't remember that being the focus, though I'm sure it was … I had just forgotten. And I thought to myself, "Oh goodness, here we go." Brace yourselves.
The story is actually very balanced, but I can see howthose with preconceived notions will think I'm promoting taking antidepressants during pregnancy. I can see how some of the quotes from mothers who did choose to take psych meds during pregnancycould be misconstrued by some as though these womenwere all happy-go-lucky about the decision. As if it was an easy decision to make.
I can't say anything about antidepressants without being accused of pushing them. Or selling them. Or being addicted to them. Or some other such claim. I do take one for my OCD/anxiety and am not ashamed of that in any way whatsoever. NOT ASHAMED, EMBARRASSED, or any other kind of stigma someone would like me to accept but that I will refuse to.
I did take meds when I had postpartum OCD, but I also went to therapy, so I can't tell you whether one was more responsible than the other for my recovery — or maybe both equally so. I think if you need medication and it works for you, good.It works for me. If you do something else that works for you, good too. Do what is right for you. But now that I've been quoted inParentDish's article on taking medication during pregnancy, I'm sure none of whatI just said will have any bearing on how certain people will respond.
It was anerve-wracking decision for me to make, to continue with my antidepressant when I was pregnant with my daughter.There are always risks when you are pregnant, with taking anything at all. There are also risks — onesof which many people are unaware — that can come with suffering from clinical depression or anxiety while pregnant. When you face a risk no matter what you do,you just have to come to accept that and make a choice. I made the choice to take meds based on the research available to me at the time, and on the fact that I didn't want my daughter swimming in anxiety inside my belly, and that I didn't want my family to suffer if I had postpartum OCD again which was likely.I chose to put the oxygen mask on myself first.Considering the positive outcome, it feels like in the end it was the right choice for me.
Sadly, there isn't enough research to make it easy for people to make a risk-free decision. There is a huge relapse rate for women who've suffered previous mental illness who go off their meds during pregnancy. There are also studies that show that babies can be negatively affected when women take antidepressants and then to make things even more confusing, there are studies that refute those studies and state that the risks to babies are minute. It's hard to navigate through it all.
I'm grateful that researchers who care about this issue are looking into as many avenues as possible fortreatments of mental illness during pregnancy, including light therapy and acupuncture. I'm grateful to the ones that are continuing to look closer at the effect –or lack thereof, whichever the case may be — of psychiatric medication on infants. I am also grateful to organizations like ACOG that realize there is no cut-and-dry answerand offer guidelines to doctors who are often uninformed about the spectrum of risk.
I hope one day it will be easier for those of us with mental illnesses like PPD to makethese kinds of decisions without worry. That will be a great day indeed. As for now, I'm comfortable with the decision I made and I hope that every other mother has as much information as possible and is supported in the decision she makes, whatever it is.
Itwill be interesting to see what kind of comments Julie's story gets. Hope you'll join the discussion.
Also, click here for more stories on pregnancy and depression.