I know a big issue for many of you is how to communicate what you are going through with your partners/husbands and to get them on board in supporting your recovery fully. I have written about this in the past. (like here, for instance: A Husband’s Perspective on Postpartum Depression)
ALSO: What other information would you like in terms of relating the illness better, or getting more support, or whatever else when it comes to the men in your life? I’ll try to get the answers for you.
Photo: Fotolia – © Maureen Steffes
I do think therapists are helpful for sharing with your partner when you are suffering with PPD. For the second time aroundwe also had a list of symptoms and a PPD contract that I could just check off bc any talking or deciding was impossible during the suffering. Do you have a list/contract that refer men/women to?
In my head I am replacing "should" in the title w "can". Part of the problem for my marriage during all this was having impossible expectations. Which is why I liked the links, both are often unable to uphold "normal". It seems like the common thread is that guys just take over an enabling role. I wonder how I might have helped my husband to both empathize w me but not belittle me about not being able to do it. Especially bc besides me being very angry for not being the perfect helper, he was being worn down doing al the duties (& they weren't helping me).
How do we support our husbands? I know I couldn't have done much during my intense days of suffering). I feel like I put him in a horrible spot for having to live through this he'll with me. He needed just as much info & support. When I finally finished therapy he checked out & found other unhealthy ways of escaping. Cheating, going out, checking out, etc. What is constructive "husband-time". I don't know how to say it, I just am so doubtful we could make it through another pregnancy as a couple. I don't know how to support him.
My OB took the time to have a discussion with my husband about PPD. I will say that I am blessed to have a husband that is already unusually in tune with this type of thing, but I think that conversation helped.
My OB actually encouraged my husband to call his office if he was concerned and I wouldn't make the call myself or didn't feel that I needed help. It hurt like hell when my husband told me he would call if I didn't, but it was the push I needed.
The links no longer work.
Um the link says it no longer works and shows an ad for getting pregnant in 60 days?
Oh dear, that’s strange. We will get that fixed!